The following is an official ship’s log and photographic treasury of a recent vacation cruise…
Getting much needed rest as I set a course for fun!
A sea day with no ports of call, or destinations as you land lubbers might say.
Grand Turk, Turks & Caicos. Now I know why they call it the “high” seas. Here I stumble from my cabin with my t-shirt on backward.
San Juan, Puerto Rico. Food is one of the best things about a cruise, and anything goes, even breakfast at 5pm.
St. Thomas, USVI. A shot of me and a ship mate, Sven Lars from the Netherlands. Or maybe it was Lars Sven.
Another day at sea and another ship mate. This is Rita from Columbus, Ohio. She briefly hit on me in the Crow’s Nest bar until my wife showed up. Then we all went back to her room and watched Terms of Endearment.
Half Moon Cay, Bahamas. On the last day of the cruise the ship’s activity director, Sandy, taught me the art of towel folding.
All in all a great excursion and I must say “we rocked it ‘till we docked it”!
When I realized how badly our Marlins owner is being treated I got so upset that I nearly shat my pants. And there’s a lot more crap. First and foremost the stadium issue. The millions and millions of dollars Mr. Loria tricked the city into spending is NOT coming out of taxpayer’s pockets, okay? So please stop whining about this. In fact, if the Marlins didn’t get that money it probably would have been wasted on improving schools and convention facilities.
Furthermore, Marlin’s park is a “crown jewel” in
Now about the trade with the Blue Jays everybody has been belly aching about. Those players were never going to be here permanently, they were only rented while county commissioners were voting on the stadium deal. That’s Mr. Loria’s genius. And with the players we got in return the Marlins are now ranked the 26th best triple A ball club in the country, so put that in your cigar and smoke it.
A wise man once said “people need love the most when they don’t deserve it” which means everyone should love Jeffery Loria, absolutely everyone.
Yeah I’m hacked off. Why? Because last week someone set up a fake twitter account in my name. They’ve released a number of statements since then, some taken from what I’ve said on the air, some completely made up. It was good enough to fool my friends and co-workers into thinking I’d cancelled the Young Ron My Space page in favor of tweeting. Plus the account now has over 9 million followers.
The person who did this took me like some out-of-town jasper and left me with strange feelings of impermanence.
Now I’m actually afraid this individual will post something that gets me in trouble. For example, they could have me saying “my partner Paul is a real jerk and I love to bad mouth him behind his back”. Between you and me, Paul is just the kind of A-hole to believe something like that.
I do accept part of the blame. Even though my radio persona is hip and fashionable and I’m known for “what’s trending now” frankly I’ve put off tweeting, mainly because all I ever do is drink and sleep. Just like I suspect Manti Te'o has been doing lately.
Note from Webby: As we’ve gone to press it’s been revealed that the mystery tweeter does not exist and the whole thing was a practical joke! To find out more listen to the Paul and Young Ron show.
Follow @YoungRonBrewer today. http://twitter.com/YoungRonBrewer
Or as you might say “why you be hay-in?” Check dis cuhz I got dat 411 on dem Lakers boyz aiight? Dey dope, but feel me an don’t be crabbin’ on da Heat cuhz dey da bomb, know what I’m sayin’?
Keep it on the L, D. otherwise trick no good up in dis place.
You droppin’ mad beats, off da hook, jus’ don’t murk my homies and we’ll be copasetic…sweeter than Cracker Jack.
Young Ron Brewer
The following is a transcribed conversation between me and my wife on the evening of January 31, 2013.
Wife: You went pretty easy on Dan Marino this morning, why?
Me: Because he’s a great quarterback.
Wife: Then how come you didn’t go easy on Arnold Schwarzenegger because he’s a great actor?
Me: You just answered your own question.
Wife: What’s wrong with these men who cheat on their wives?
Me: Any man in his situation would be tempted.
Wife: Does that mean if you were in his situation you would be tempted?
Wife: So if a sexy young woman asked you to sleep with her... you wouldn’t?
Me: Not without your go ahead.
Wife: He’s been married for 28 years, why would he want to fool around with someone else?
Me: You just answered your own question again.
Wife: Hey, what’s that? You’re not recording our private conversations are you?
Me: Of course not sweetheart.
Boy, the person who nicknamed television “the boob tube” was right on the money. You don’t hear the expression much these days probably because t.v.’s aren’t made with tubes anymore. But just check out those boobs, so to speak. Maury Povich exploits teen pregnancy, a Kardashian gets a yeast infection, Honey Boo Boo farts in the toothless face of her Uncle/Daddy who has a 2nd grade education.
The worst offender, at least this week, may be those in charge of the NFL’s broadcast of the Super Bo…oh, I can’t say that. Do you believe this crap? Some punk can break into an unoccupied 2 ½ million dollar mansion in Boca and legally live there free, but I can’t say S---- B--- on the radio. This world is going straight to hell. And I’m going straight to jail because tomorrow I intend to break the law. If you listen to the Paul and Young Ron show tomorrow morning you will hear me talk about “the super bowl of oatmeal I had for breakfast” and “for a real super bowl try Don Carter’s lanes in Tamarac” and “my sidekick Paul Castronovo had an extra large toilet installed in his home for sanitary reasons. He calls it the super bowl.”
There are some pretty good shows on t.v. but not many. The Burn with Jeff Ross on Comedy Central comes to mind along with Impractical Jokers on Tru-TV. Plus there’s Sophia Vegara on Modern Family. Now that’s my kind of boob tube.
Did she or didn’t she? Who gives a good b.m? I watched Beyonce at the inauguration and I haven’t been that excited since Ms. Brewer and I bought our first shower massager back in the 1980’s. And just like with Ms. Brewer, it doesn’t bother me that she fakes it. In fact, I think I’d get aroused watching Beyonce chew gum.
I imagine Wes Welker’s wife is disgusted with Beyonce and probably thinks she’s “a cheater and a poor role model” but do you honestly believe President O’bama just got up and winged it? Of course not, his speech was carefully prepared and crafted just like a fine painting, a tasty meatball sandwich AND Beyonce’s song.
So don’t worry baby girl. This reporter’s got your big, beautiful backside, mainly because I too know what it’s like to have trouble performing.