What is a Paraprosdokian? Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous.
(Winston Churchill loved them) Thanks to Paul, our rock and roll teacher, for sending these along!

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on my list.

3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

5. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

6. In filling out an application, where it says,  'In case of emergency, Notify:' I put 'DOCTOR'.

7. You do not need a parachute to skydive.
You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

8. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

9. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.