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| #10 Kelly Pickler Likes Popcorn Instead Of Peanuts -
Why do blondes have more fun? They're easier to amuse. |
#9 Jack Black's Rendition Will Make Your Butt Explode - How have Jack Black and Jack White never gotten together for a duet album? Just something I've always wondered.
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| #8 William Hung Butchers Another Timeless Classic - I mean, why would you want someone to buy you peanuts and Cracker Jack when they can buy you penis and Cracker Jack.
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#7 Devin Hester Sings And Mumbles His Own Version - Halfway through the song he must've had flashbacks of Rex Grossman in the Super Bowl.
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| #6 Danica Patrick's Voice Has A Flat Tire - I'm just going to pretend I never saw this and go look at her FHM spread again. Ahhhh, that's better.
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#5 Eddie Vedder's Wasted Version Of "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" - I've been to several Pearl Jam concerts. Sounds pretty much the same to me.
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| #4 Jeff Gordon Is Just Happy To Be At Wrigley Stadium? - If Jeff Gordon ever wants to understand why everyone hates him, all he has to do is watch this video again and again.
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#3 Mike Ditka Sings The Fastest Rendition Of "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" Ever - I scoured the entire internet for this damn video and was defeated by Lord Internet. I even hired a robot who specializes in finding Mike Ditka singing videos on the web and the robot short circuited after two hours of Google searching with no results. Do you have any idea how expensive Mike Ditka-singing-web-searching robots are?! Anyway, I found the audio file and believe me, it's just as good.
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| #2 Ozzy Ozbourne Kinds Sings Take Me Out To The Ballgame - This is exactly what it would sound like if anyone from the bleachers at Wrigley tried to sing this song in the 7th inning.
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#1 1979 Harry Caray "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" Montage-
Harry Caray is one of the few people that should be allowed to live forever. Well, maybe Jenna Jameson too. The ten-years-ago Jenna Jameson, that is. |
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